Flatulence

Flatulence is a normal bodily function which is deemed to be revolting in polite society. Growing up my sisters and I were taught by our parents that it was unlady like to fart at the dinner table or even worse in public. My sisters and I went through life sucking them back until we were ready to explode. As a result hearing someone fart would bring on titters of laughter and to this day I still can't hear someone fart without laughing.


So imagine my shock when I married into my husbands family and everyone around you was letting them rip left, right and center. When visiting his grandmother and the grand old lady happened to fart you didn't dare laugh as she would scold you. To the Chinese, farting is a normal process and they rationalize that to hold it in will result in stomach ache not to mention bloating. Which we all know to be true. My baby grandaughter who has the face of an angel farts like a trucker, loud, long and smelly. So what exactly is it that causes us to fart.


Flatulence happens when there is excessive gas in the stomach and the intestines causing you to burp or fart. One website says that most people produce one to three pints a day and pass gas about fourteen times a day. Excessive farting is not life threatening but it can be embarrassing for most people but not all. Hippocrates claimed that passing gas was necessary to well being and Emperor Claudius decreed that all Romans should fart whenever necessary. In France, in the 1800's, a few entertainers performed on stage, their act, farting at will and at varying degree's of pitch. They performed for sold out shows.


The primary components of gas or flatus are nitrogen, hydrogen, carbon dioxide, methane and oxygen which sounds like a pretty leathal combination. The lovely odour is caused by trace elements of skatole, indole and compounds that contain sulfur which is produced by paticular bacteria not found in everyone. This explains why some people don't smell as bad as others. Hydrogen and methane found in flatus is what gives it it's flammable character, so maybe you can light fire to a fart.

The body does not digest and absorb all the carbs we eat such as sugar, starches and fiber so it is passed from the small intestine to the large intestine where harmless bacteria breaks it down producing hydrogen, carbon dioxide and in a third of all people methane. The people producing methane are the stinky few. These gases eventually leave the body through the rectum. Foods that produce gas in one person may not produce gas in another.


So which food should you avoid in order to prevent the unpleasantness of gas? Beans, brussel sprouts, cabbage, broccoli, assparagus and whole grains. Starches found in potatoes, corn, noodles and wheat. Rice does not produce gas. Onions, artichokes and pears as well as beer, red wine and sorbitol which is sugar found in certain foods. Soluble fiber is not broken down in the small intestine and so produces gas. Those people who are lactose intolerant can also suffer from a flatulence problem.


While flatulence may be an embarrassing subject to most people, to some it is not, especially the male population who fart at will, anywhere anytime. Many young men like to make a game of farting seeing who can fart the longest and loudest, letting off SBD's (silent but deadly) in movie theaters and elevators letting others breath in their knoxious fumes. My own son likes to fart in the car then lock all the windows letting his siblings, mother and girl friend bask in his special aroma. Shopping malls are the best places to fart, with all that noise no one can hear you but god help you if you walk through a knoxious cloud. Yes farting may be an embarrassing subject to most, but ultimately in the end it really does feel good to let her rip.