The Older Woman

You see it all the time, the fat, balding, aging man dating or having an affair with a twenty something year old girl. Yes at that age they are still girls who are frivolous and haven’t really lived much of their life. They are full of insecurities and need constant reaffirmation that you love them and that they are beautiful. The woman in her twenties does not fully trust her man and is forever questioning his were abouts and what he’s been up to. She’ll never trust that you’ve been hanging out with your buddies having a few drinks and shooting the shit. Sure you look at other girls, surreptitiously, when you are with her and openly ogle them when you’re with your friends, after all it’s a guy thing that a twenty something year old girl will never understand. In her mind you have her so why do you need to look at another hot chick.

A woman over thirty is a different kettle of fish all together. We’re psychic, we know you look at other women and we also know what you’ve been up to. We can see it in your face every time. You’ll never have to tell us about your multitude of indiscressions and we wouldn’t hesitate to shoot you if we could get away with it, but since we can’t we have other ways of making you pay. We can praise you lavishly even when it’s not deserved or we can tear you to the ground. We know what it’s like to be unappreciated. We don’t lay awake at night and wonder what you’re thinking about because frankly speaking we don’t give a crap. We know there isn’t much going on in that mind of yours and we’d rather get our sleep anyway. If you want to watch sports or play your games, go ahead we won’t bitch about it, we can find something else to do that is much more rewarding and fulfilling.

We don’t care what you think about us or what we are doing. We are self assured enough to know what we want and when we want it. We don’t need your reassurance. Even if we don’t trust you we will still introduce you to our girlfriends because we know they will not betray us. Dining out with us is pleasant because we won’t start a brawl with you in the middle of a restaurant. We’re dignified and wise enough to know that the silent treatment cuts deeper. Women over thirty are more honest and will surely tell you what an ass you’ve been if need be. We don’t pull punches and we can take as good as we give without breaking down in tears. Women over the age of thirty are sexier. By this time we have reached our sexual peak, we know what we want in bed and we know what you want. We don’t need to fake orgasm and if it wasn’t enjoyable we’ll let you know. We want to be pleasured as much as you want to be please.

If you decide you want to go out with your friends for a little male bonding, please do. We won’t stop you or whine about it or insist on going with you because we know that the saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder” is true as does “familiarity breeds contempt”. The same goes for” out of sight out of mind” because we surely do not sit and think about you every minute of the day. We need our space as much as you need yours and we don’t want you breathing down our necks all the time.